Sunday, February 3, 2013

Freedom Friday #8

Welcome to another rendition of FREEDOM FRIDAY (brought to you yet again on a day other than Friday :p Anyway...this one is a mega event, because I had to postpone last this is two weeks of freedom slammed into one. Honestly...there wasn't that many freedom foods this past week because I have had so much freedom with finally giving in and doing my whole plan. Honestly I have begun to feel a hope and freedom I can't explain. Today I wasn't so fortunate with those feelings, but I know if I fight through on the days I feel like giving in....those days will get less and less and the freedom days will come more and more.

 Well to start of this mega Freedom Friday (idk how many have actually been on Friday)...let's jump straight to what I eluded to in my last freedom post.....doing a muffin :) I got a HUGE craving for a blueberry muffin....namely a Weight Watchers blueberry muffin. I know, I know...people think...totally ED, but you have to understand. I LOVE THESE THINGS. In fact, back when I was 8 and my mom had me on WW, I was only allowed these once a week....and only if I had "earned" them (aka exercised). I haven't had them in years, but have always wanted to have one I finally got the courage. Well....WW decided to downsize and (frankly) downgrade their I felt freedom...but wish it would have come sooner..before they changed their recipe. Just another sorrow of putting things off till tomorrow...
 all also heard me gripe about sack lunches and I got to experience them for the first time. And because the dining hall loves me sooooo much...they decided (and have for the past two weeks) to give me my biggest vegetable fear of carrots, a double portion of my fear of deli meat...and then put it on the onion roll I have been avoiding since I was 14. So this my freinds...this was freedom. And you know what...freedom didn't taste so bad after all. And now...4 sack lunches later...I not only conquer the sandwich and carrots...but face cookies too (will put them in next post).

 Later on that week (actually on the same day as a nutrition appt) I planned on facing Chicken Fajitas. Well...I didn't plan on getting to the dining hall 10 minutes before they closed and having them run out of Chicken Fajitas. They also happened to run out of "safe" options for me....leaving me face to face with one of my biggest fears...Chick'n nuggets. These aren't real chicken, but are parents have bought them for me multiple times and had to throw them out because I never ate them. And the dining hall...they were my only option. And I conquered them :) Apparently I am supposed to do 4 to 6 (only did 3) but's a start. Oh...and sorry for the bite I took out of them.....fear made me almost forget to snap a picture lol. Overall I can't tell you how they tasted's another thing fear does to me. So guess this means I will have to eat them again. Wait...rephrase....I have the chance to eat them again :)

Speaking of parents buying next Freedom Food I got at x-mas and it has been in my freezer ever since.....Reese's Xmas trees. I don't know the last time I had a Reese's....think my N made me do one last year at some point...but I ended up using behaviors later. But this time....that was not gonna happen. Actually...this was a spur of the moment decision to do as well, and boy...was it a good one. I ate Reese's the only way they can be eaten...outsides first...then lick off chocolate on top..then enjoy PB with a layer of chocolate. Yes...I'm still scared of them...but guess what....this came in a 3-pack so there's two more left ;)

And face yet again last week....TURKEY BURGER. The school's grill was cross-contaminated with red meat and cheese....the first of which I don't eat ethically...the later my tummy can't they had to cook this in the microwave. It was in this moment I saw how dumb ED is. Every time I get this burger I freak out because it looks greasy and get convinced it's smothered in oil. However due to some tummy issues...I would know if this was the case and it never is. Well...this time it really couldn't be because it was microwaved...and guess looked the same "greasy" level as before. Wanna know why? Because like everyone and my N have tried to tell's moisture from the burger itself not grease. I mean really....who wants to bite into a dry burger...NO ONE! So I enjoyed it...still struggled...but there were 5 minutes of tasting and enjoying.

Now this beauty came from a commitment I made to do real Triumph fact I am on day 9 of doing that...except now my snack is called a Sweet Suprise.So when the chance came to do Devil's Food Cake...I did it. This is a step towards facing "real cake" like....cake slice from the bakery cake. But this is a step in the right direction and I am proud of myself for it. Honestly...I feel I could easily do this one again....that's right...easily :)
And I am also working on the Spring Semester Goals I set and one of those is trying new dining hall foods. So I decided to face a dish called Mushroom Pilaf at my school. Honestly...there were no mushrooms and it was more just white rice with vegetables. But white rice (or rice of any kind) is a big fear food of mine...and I am continuing to work on incorporating it. Probably won't be with this rice though...because the taste wasn't all that good. But I am now on a 3-try rule...I can't rule something out until I eat it three I will continue to be open to it.

Now on the fateful cupcake day you all heard about I actually ended up facing a freedom food that morning as well. Remember when Peanut Butter and Co sent me all those peanut butters? Well I tried one flavor (Cinnamon Raisin) and have been eating it every because it is FREAKING DELICIOUS, but also because it is the safest. But I decided I needed to branch out...and so I moved on to Dark Chocolate Dreams. I never let myself have chocolate (even chocolate flavored) especially not at b-fast. But hey...this is a new journey of recovery and a new me, so I broke that rule. This flavor wasn't as good as Cinnamon Raisin to me in the morning (chocolate in the morning just isn't my thing), but want to try it with banana...or maybe some kind of dessert (graham crackers maybe). So for now...I am sticking with my Cinnamon Raisin...but you know I have the option of this flavor too...if I had a craving. Before I tried it...I had too much fear to even have an option. Next one to face: Spice it Up!

And last...but certain not least. Let's get one more look at the lovely Lemon Cupcake! Had to do a double-take...did I really eat a cupcake this week? Did I really, spur of the moment, unplanned eat a cupcake? Did I really eat a cupcake and not restrict at any of my other meals and snacks? Yep, I did....cause this girl....she's hungry for freedom :)

Did you face any freedom foods this week?
Want to suggest any from my list for me to try and tackle?

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