So tonight I shared the fear food list with my parents and that was a HUGE deal for me. Letting people in and opening myself up to judgment based on the fact I now have over 300 fear foods…it was HUGE. ED told me they would be disgusted. Told me they would check me into treatment if they saw the list. And I almost let that keep me from sharing it with them. ALMOST. But….I ended up sucking it up and handing over the list.
Now…it wasn’t the best idea to do this at the same time as trying to cook dinner which was already running late, because they had a million questions and it all got overwhelming and delayed dinner even more. But hey…lesson learned. Still…they now know.
The other hard thing about this is now I have to face a certain number every week. We haven’t decided the number, but will have family meetings every Saturday starting this Sat where we choose them for the week. I am scared because now I can’t take it at my own rate or skip weeks or even choose them…my family is going to be a part. I know it’s a good thing, but it’s scary too.
So if I have time for What I Ate Wednesday tomorrow I am going to post some things I hope to soon face. And I will try and post every weekend which foods I am facing. I would love for this to be a recovery get together and other people can feel free to face a food and send me a pic or message and I can give you a shout out on my weekly post. Even if it’s anonymous. Or just cheer you on from my own heart, no post needed J
Well I love you all. Oh! I also am already facing a fear food tonight and maybe will post it tomorrow but wish me luck. And I dropped one session of strength this week which is huge deal too. I feel scared, but I am excited too. Love you all.